Yoga With Charmaine

People-pleasing, a curse.

Dear Reader,

I’ve been thinking about where I should be taking not only my site and blog, but also my business as a whole. When I tackle the apprehension and pressure of attempting to create a plan of action, I meet an impasse that prevents me from believing I can.

However, I realise now, that the reason I meet this impasse is my use of the word “should”. What “should” I be writing about; when “should” I be releasing classes; how “should” I be creating classes; what “should” I be aiming for; how “should” I be running my business; why “should” I be teaching yoga; who “should” I be pleasing…and that’s when it hit me – my original aim was not to please, nor serve people.

My “why” is to share a practice that helps me in times of need; to help others feel a moment of release should they want; and to free myself from living a life dependent on the system.

This realisation hit me at a very good time. A time when I stopped abiding by boundaries I set when beginning to teach. My time and effort outside of delivering classes is an unseen effort that often does not get noticed. Planning groups of classes (location, cost, capacity, frequency, accessibility etc.); creating lesson plans with adaptations; advertising online and in person; answering questions; booking students in; collecting completed health forms; ensuring students know the way; arriving early and leaving late to prep and cleanse the area. These are all very much part of sharing yoga with others, and parts that I usually enjoy.

Despite this, over the last month I have noticed myself slipping into habits to please others, even if it means taking more of my valuable time and effort to serve in a way that does not align with my “why”. People-pleasing behaviour has always been a curse I have carried, placing myself in situations where I feel uncomfortable, doing things I do not want to do and following through with plans that do not align with my values. I promised myself that I would not let this seep into my yoga business, yet the pressures of “should” outweighed my original goals. To be completely honest, I did not recognise my worth and expected to scrounge for students. I recognise that no one is perfect and did not expect to effortlessly eradicate this behaviour from my life, but I did not expect it to seep into my yoga business this quickly.

Nonetheless, I am glad I have noticed and will realign my focus and reduce people pleasing. This reflection has been one that is hard to admit, but, also very freeing –

Students want to come to my classes and enjoy my authentic self.

I am immensely grateful, and so very lucky, to have met this many positive, encouraging and beautiful people in my journey so far – you guys are the reason I took this path and are the reason I will continue to share my practice.

I have enjoyed sharing my reflections and will sign off on this positive note, hopefully someone reads this and smiles.

Until next time, stay grounded, breathe deeply, and embrace each moment with authenticity.

Namaste,

Charmaine